You often hear parents complaining about their teens and how they don’t listen to them. Talking to a teenager is sometimes close to impossible. They are both stubborn and egoistic, which makes it hard to have a conversation with them.
Teens are at a transitional phase between childhood and adulthood. It’s a hard place to be in; that’s why they act the way they are. Additionally, they go through hormonal and bodily changes that make them more aggressive and thus more rebellious.
How to talk to a teen who is both overwhelmed and arrogant? It’s truly a difficult task, especially if you still think of them as little children. Whether you’re a parent or someone who deals with teens, this task needs some skills. It’s not impossible once you know how to talk to them. After all, teens communicate with each other effectively, which means there has to be a way. You just have to learn it.
Here are the best 5 tips on how to talk to a teen:
The 1st tip on how to talk to a Teen is to never start a conversation with “let’s talk.”
While it may seem like the most natural way of starting a conversation, saying “Let’s talk” may be an alarming thing to your teen. It’s hard to communicate with a teen when you alarmingly come to them. This makes meaningful communication hard. Instead of doing it that way, try to say nothing and hang around them in a non-demanding way. For example, you can just sit beside your teen for a while without talking. Often, your teen will start the conversation.
The 2nd tip on how to talk to a teen is to ask not to tell!
Parents love their children and always want the best for them. Sometimes you might order your child to do something that you know is good for her/him. But, this doesn’t work because, as we’ve already said, teens are stubborn and egoistic. The best way to approach such a person is by asking nicely. You have to show a little bit of respect for their personality and agency over themselves.
The 3rd tip on how to talk to a teen is to try empathy instead of blame!
Let’s suppose your teen told you that she/he is failing the exam or won’t go to the school you set for her/him. The first reaction might be anger and blame. But that is only going to make matters worse. Instead of saying something in a state of anger, try to think twice and talk from your heart and empathize. When you empathize, you make it easy for your teen to open up and be willing to hear you and perhaps change her/his mind.
The 4th tip on how to talk to a teen is to agree to disagree & to compromise.
Families are always bound to have conflict. But, conflict doesn’t always have to be a negative thing. Sometimes it’s good to disagree. But, you must never let your emotions drive you to try to dominate the situation. A good alternative would be to agree to disagree. After you establish that, you work a compromise. Negotiating a solution that suits both parties will leave everyone satisfied. Sometimes, none of you has to compromise; it’s a win-win situation.
The 5th tip on how to talk to a teen is to apologize when you mess things up.
It’s normal for a parent or an adult to make a mistake with a child, especially a teenager; they are sometimes more sensitive. They are also annoying and know how to press your buttons, which might drive you to say something harsh that you will regret later. The best thing to do in this case is to apologize as soon as you realize your mistake. It will work most of the time because teens are quite forgiving when you are sincere.
As long as you’re coming from a place of love and empathy, you’ll be able to communicate with a troubled teen; this is how to talk to a teen effectively. By being tyrannical, you will close all the windows of true communication. Teens don’t like to feel inferior, especially when you’re trying to force them to do something. Try instead to treat them as equals, although you’re not really equal. They already understand your role as a parent and that you are more powerful and wise than they are, so don’t take advantage of that privilege.
We hope that our tips on how to talk to a teen were helpful and knowledgeable.